I am the woman I am today because my mother was raised by a woman with a strong commitment to her children. There was nothing and no-one that could stand in the way of my grandmother and the vision that she had for her daughter. Every child deserves a grandmother that is a little indulgent and a gives out lots of hugs and love. My children have my mother as their grandmother.
Grandma, Mommy, Sister and Me. This is/was my circle of 4. My grandmother is gone now. I miss her. I miss that my children won’t know her like I did. I miss that they won’t get advice from her. They can’t taste her soup. She can’t make them a nice cup of Milo with extra condensed milk. Instead they get to call the woman she raised as their grandmother.
This morning my mother called me to tell me that she was proud of my dedication to my family, proud of the way I mother. I wanted to say, “I got it from you.” I wanted to tell her that I got every bit of it from her but I was interrupted by a bouncing 3 year old who realized that her grandma was on the phone. Those two love each other without bounds. They go on dates, they talk for as long as necessary and one of them cries when it’s time to leave (I won’t say who). The stern, loving and self-sacrificing woman who raised me is now a doting grandmother. I love watching the way she is with my children. She’s a bit unrecognizable yet charmingly familiar. Grandmothering suits her. It’s a beautiful dance of love.
About 10 years ago, before I was a mother, I gathered the most important women in my life and we took a picture….together. Now that my grandmother is gone, this gift is the one thing that I treasure the most. I am happy that on mother’s day so many years ago, I invested in a gift to my legacy that will probably outlive all of us. I am eager for the portrait session this summer with my kids and their grandparents because the legacy continues. The memories never end. The stories keep going. The influence of generations of mothers is beautiful.